Back in Barcelona. Nice to be able to communicate beyond my 50-word vocabulary in France.
Driving to Monaco and back (1,400 km), we didn't see one police car. And people drive fast. While driving about 170 k/hr yesterday, I got passed by Julia Roberts in a convertible Porsche doing about 220 k. I swear it was her, but I couldn't catch her to find out! Stacy and I have speculated the whole story about how she is travelling to promote her new pelicula.
What we did see, though, was a crazy amount of toll booths. It costs over $100 US to make the drive from Barcelona to Monaco (400ish miles). You are constantly stopping to pay the next toll. So, the way I think of it is, instead of patrolling the highways, they just give everyone a ticket, and call it a toll.
Also, the signs on gas stations showing the prices make it appear that gas is cheap, at least to the ordinary American idiot. You'll see signs that say 1.40 or so. But this is euros per liter. So multiplying by approximately 4 and then 1.4 to convert to dollars per gallon, and it hits you: Gas is almost $8/gallon here.
Before I unplug and head to Ibiza for 2 days, I'll leave you with my lastest 10 top list. I have tried (and mostly succeeded) in keeping an open mind, so that when I encounter something unusual or different, I try to put myself in a local person's shoes, and imagine that this is completely normal to them, and whatever it is that I'm more accustomed to would seem very strange to them.
So, without further ado, here the top 10 comments that Europeans make when visiting the US.
10. "Don't you think it's weird that grocery stores and drug stores are so big?"
9. "You mean stores are all open in the middle of the day? That's stupid."
8. "People need so much personal space here!"
7. "Why is everyone so nice?" (Applies only to French and Monaco travellers, and excludes the Northeast US.)
6. "You can add a tip on a credit card receipt in restaurants? Freaky!!"
5. "Everyone in this entire country speaks the exact same language! Ha. How simple."
4. "Bread is free in restaurants? Don't the dumb Americans know they can charge??"
3. "These big streets are creeping me out."
2. "Hardly anyone smokes here. How immature."
And the number one thing Europeans must say is the US:
1. "Everything is so new and clean. Yuck."
Hasta luego!
-S
Love the top 10 list. Have fun in Ibiza!
ReplyDeleteOMG, Scott! I have loved reading your daily updates. I have laughed my ass off!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry I'm waiting until you are on your way HOME to finally respond!
O.k, either I laugh way too easily (simple-minded-me) or Scott, you are quite possibly the funniest guy I know!!! Your writing skills and techniques rival the best authors I've read! You should consider a career in writing for a travel magazine. I'm going to specifically use the Running with the Bulls piece with my 4th graders minus a few sentences here or there that were meant for adults only. I'm going to tell them, "Now this...is how you explode the moment."
So in other words, your writing is good enough for 4th graders!
On another note, my favorite piece was the street performer "monkey man". What I wouldn't give to actually have SEEN you dancing with the monkey man! I still keep hoping someone in the crowd was recording it, and it will pop up on YouTube!
Looking forward to seeing you when you get back!
Laurie
p.s. Jason's been reading them too, and we both think you are hilarious!
Yes, just charge me $100 and let me go...nice! Yes, CVS is way to big but at least in California they sell booze. Laurie was right on one thing for sure...Dude...I absolutely keep cracking up every time I think of the Chris Katan- Monkey Man bit. I want to hear that story when you get home.
ReplyDeleteSpeeding tickets in Monaco would be silly! Most people could handle paying their way out of them. I like to think of speeding tickets as my way to pay my "toll fee" for speeding. Seems easier to handle that way.
ReplyDeleteGas that it $8 bucks a gallon?! This will do wonders for my future inheritance.
Bonus comment: I just failed my first CAPTCHA. And I was sooo close to Reaganing.)
ReplyDelete(A term from Alec Baldwin in 30 Rock: In the beginning of the episode, Jack tells Liz that he has entered "a magic zone of error-free living" which he calls "Reaganing"—named after former United States President Ronald Reagan.)